💔 When Love Turns to Loss: A Cautionary Tale for Australians About Online Romance Scams

A recent A Current Affair investigation uncovered a heartbreaking story of how a man lost hundreds of thousands of dollars to online romance scammers. After his death, his ex-wife found bank statements, receipts and tens of thousands of dollars in gift cards sent to scammers he believed were love interests. He even took out a reverse mortgage of $150,000 to continue funding the relationships, despite having very real financial needs at home.

This devastating example isn’t isolated — romance scams are one of the fastest-growing and most financially damaging scams in Australia, with over $28.6 million lost in 2025 alone.

This pensioner lost hundreds of thousands of dollars in the scams. (A Current Affair)

The Human Cost

• The emotional impact can be profound. Victims can feel betrayed, isolated and ashamed once the truth is uncovered.

  
  

• Financial losses can wipe out life savings, retirement funds, or home equity — particularly hurting people over 65, who had the highest total reported losses among age groups

  
  

• Some victims may unknowingly become involved in criminal activity — such as serving as money mules or shipping packages on behalf of scammers.

What Is a Romance Scam?

A romance scam is a type of fraud where criminals build trust and emotional connections online — often through dating apps or social media — and then use that connection to extract money or personal information from victims.

Scammers typically:

• Create fake profiles with attractive photos and compelling personal backstories.

• Move quickly to declare strong feelings to emotionally hook you.

• Push to communicate off the dating site (e.g., to WhatsApp or private messaging).

  
  

• Ask for money, gift cards, cryptocurrency, or personal financial details.

Recognising the Red Flags

Here are warning signs to watch out for:

🚩Too Fast, Too Intense 

If someone professes deep feelings shortly after connecting.

🚩Avoids Video Chats or In-Person Meetings 

They always have an excuse.

🚩Pressure to Move Off a Secure Platform

Scammers want to avoid traceable apps.

🚩Requests for Money or Personal Details

Especially early in communication.

🚩Vague or Inconsistent Story

Dates, names or details don’t add up.

🚩Excuses Why They Can’t Meet or Show Proof

Frequent distractions and delays.

Tips to Avoid Falling for a Romance Scam

1. Take Things Slowly

Real relationships take time to develop. Be cautious if someone tries to rush emotional intimacy or commitment.

2. Verify Their Identity

Search their photos online, ask for video calls, and check whether their social media presence is consistent and authentic.

3. Never Send Money to Someone You Only Met Online

This includes bank transfers, cryptocurrency, gift cards, or moving money for someone else — which could implicate you in criminal activity.

4. Talk to Someone You Trust

A second opinion from a family member or friend can help you see the warning signs you might have missed.

5. Use Reputable Dating Platforms

Sites with verification and reporting systems can help screen out bad actors. Also, they have built in messaging platforms that provide some degree of traceability and safety.

How to Safely Enjoy Online Dating

Online dating can be a positive way to meet people — but safety should always be your top priority:

✔ Stay on Platform Initially

Use secure, well-known dating sites or apps and avoid shifting to private messaging too quickly.

✔ Protect Your Personal Info

Never share sensitive financial details, passwords, or identity documents with anyone new.

✔ Meet Publicly

If you choose to meet in person after a conversation, pick a public place and let someone know where you’re going. Even better, take a friend and arrive early so they can sit nearby and keep an eye on you. Your date doesn't need to know about them, and the bonus is that after the date, you can chat with your friend to learn their observations. This can be very helpful for making an accurate assessment of your first meeting.

What to Do If You’re a Victim

If you think you’ve been targeted or scammed:

Report It To:

• The National Anti-Scam Centre (Scamwatch).

• Report to your bank immediately to try to stop or reverse transactions.

• File a report with the police and provide all communication records.

Remember, it's important to share your experience because you could help someone else avoid falling victim to the same scammer. Shared awareness improves security for us all.

Seek Support

Talk to trusted friends and family. Emotional support and practical help are vital.

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Australia Romance Scam Snapshot (2025)

• $28.6 million+ lost to romance scams.

• Online contact — social media and dating platforms — accounted for over 80% of losses

• Older Australians are especially at risk due to accumulated wealth and trust in online communications.